Category Archives: Random Thoughts

There Seems to Be Some Sort of Sporting Event Today

The title of this post is what I considered for a Facebook status update today, because I like to joke about my sportsball ignorance and general obtuse approach to all things sport-related. HOWEVER, it is Super Bowl Sunday and lots and lots of people have told me that, so I can’t pretend not to know. I mean, the PREACHER at CHURCH mentioned it last week. That was actually the first I’d heard of it, other than the being alive 37 years and living in America.

But, just in case you find yourself facing a Sunday in February and NOT knowing that the Super Bowl is on that day, here are some great ways to know that it is, indeed, Super Bowl Sunday.

1. Your Social Feeds are Full of It

boyntonBut let’s be honest. These days, your social feeds are likely the first place you learn anything. Who died on The Walking Dead, that awful thing about Suge Knight, if it’s snowing…

You avoid the feeds if you DVRed your show, so if you’re looking to NOT know it’s Super Bowl time, avoid the social media world. Because in addition to people just casually mentioning it, there are people (believe it or not) who actually CARE WHO WINS. They’re, like, rooting for teams and stuff.

2. The Grocery Store

beerThe top things the grocery store runs out of on Super Bowl Sunday are:
(based on absolutely no reliable data whatsoever)

  • Beer
  • Frozen chicken wings
  • Raw chicken wings (some people are ambitious)
  • Tortilla Chips and Salsa
  • Hell, who are we kidding, all the chips
  • Solo cups
  • Paper plates
  • TUMS
  • Soda pop
  • BC Powder
  • Bleu Cheese Dressing

If your grocery store is out of these things all at the same time, there is a good chance, it’s Super Bowl time.

3. They Talk About It On Legitimately Newsy News Outlets

It’s on GMA. It’s on CNN. It’s all over the other networks. There’s a human interest story on NPR had something snarky to say ( They’re all talking about it. But you know that second, because you checked Facebook first. It’s not like it’s a fake plane crash or a Bigfoot story. Super Bowl time is really here.

4. You Can’t Get A Drink in A Bar

Super bOWL Bar Shot

Whether you’re a social person who goes out to be social in bars or a person who randomly thinks, “hey, it’s totally uncharacteristic of me but I think I’ll go get a drink in a bar,” Super Bowl Sunday is problematic. Unless you’re going to watch the game, you go way early, and you have a DD who won’t mind if you sob into your wing-stained fan jersey later in the night – either because of your team’s loss or because you just don’t understand that Katy Perry person. You’re really kind of relating to those Russell Brand interviews, so you just sort of wonder what’s wrong with her. If you’re just going to a bar for a drink? Pick another day. The bartenders and waitstaff are stressed to the max, rabid sportsball fans are experiencing extreme mood swings, and the smell of cheap beer, Buffalo sauce and despair are thick. Just stay home.

So, happy Super Bowl to those of you who care about the sportsballing. For those of you who don’t, I hope you’re not in the mood for wings.



Thoughts on Stuff and Things

This is sort of a brain dump.

Am Creepy

If the people I love knew how beautiful I think they are, they would be totally creeped out. I don’t mean it in a creepy way, I just think that when you love people it amplifies their beauty in your eyes. For me, it amps it up big time.

I figure I should add some pictures to visually stimulate you into reading all my self indulgent ramblings
I figure I should add some pictures to visually stimulate you into reading all my self indulgent ramblings. Wouldn’t it be funny if those were BATS instead of birds? And even if they are just birds, clearly she would really need that umbrella, because the odds of getting pooped on just increased a lot, Sister.

It’s History. It’s Poetry.

I have this one acquaintance with whom I have practically no interaction, but we are Facebook friends. He posts late night poems in his notes. Whenever I check Facebook in the morning and I see posts from him, I get really happy because he’s actually a pretty awesome poet. Kind of Ted Hughes-ish. It makes me happy when people have these talents. Because the guy is not a “I’m going to be a famous poet” guy, nor is he a “I went to grad school for poetry” guy. He’s a guy who does other stuff, but he writes these amazing poems.

Ted Hughes, not the guy from Facebook. Because how creepy would THAT be?

The Internet

I’m aware of the fact that my mind is busy constructing a new philosophy about the internet. It’s not ready yet, but when it is I think that it might change some of the work I do. It’s already changed a bit of what I was working on. I think it will change more. It’s funny. I think social media is kind of good. I know people who think it is a colossal waste of time and I get that. I wonder what other things I could have accomplished while I was checking Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Pinterest, G+ and the rest. I wonder about the time I’ve lost because Facebook was a gateway to certain online games that have sucked away time AND money. Then I realize that people like this one lady I know, Donna Highfill, who writes and is very, very funny are using the internet and social media in a  positive, good way. That she posts status updates that make me think, laugh and that is good. I’m all about using social media for that. Anyway, I’ve been thinking a lot about the internet. SEO especially. Ethics. PR. Stuff. So I’m aware that my mind is busy working through this problem and kind of irritated about it, since I have stuff to do, darn it.

This is a totally unrelated image. It's a painting by August Friedrich Schenck. Enjoy. I find it heartbreaking and creepy all at the same time.
This is a totally unrelated image. It’s a painting by August Friedrich Schenck. Enjoy. I find it heartbreaking and creepy all at the same time.

Real Estate

I’m fascinated with this real estate thing. I’m working part time for a REALTOR (they make it all capitals for some reason) and I’m so blown away by the fact that people can do this for a living. The guy I’m working for is really good at it, so I’m learning a lot. It’s a complicated business but the needs and need fulfillment are simple. Somebody needs to buy a house. Somebody needs to sell a house. Help them. Get paid.

For some reason, I laughed for, like, 2 minutes at this picture.
For some reason, I laughed for, like, 2 minutes at this picture.

Life As We Know It

It’s really easy to get caught up in your everyday life and ignore what’s going on around you in the world.  For instance, while I’m busy commissioning posts about foreign poker sites and how to get started in your underwater basket-weaving venture, people I know are actually trying to make a difference in all this economic mess.  And I feel guilty.

I mean, I have a job to do.  And, I’m trying to do other things to help secure my future – even if those things include live-blogging a reality tv program (new post on that to follow) and co-writing a book about smoothies.  Smoothies are good, right?  Tasty.  But I feel guilty that I’m not doing more to help out fellow people in need, to spread the word about the injustices that go on in the world, and to basically make my opinion known.

The thing is, I haven’t had time to form an opinion.  What kind of person does that make me?  I can tell you every ingredient that is supposed to go into a smoothie, I can summarize Simon Cowell’s entire career to date, I know everything about J.D. Salinger, and I can wax poetic about clever Tumblr accounts, but I can’t speak with authority or insight on many of the problems that face our country and our world today.

So that stops now.  Starting now I get educated.  I won’t be turning this blog into a political blog.  Nope, I’ll still be blogging about Jeremy Sisto’s creepiness and my excessive love for monkeys here.  But soon I’ll be starting a new site that is open to all.  A place where I’ll post reputable information and allow a dialog between people who care and want to make a difference.

It’s the least…the very least…I can do.

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