I don’t know what it is about this particular Christmas. Maybe it’s the economy or my depresing work situation or just a little 31-year-old midlife crisis but I’m pretty blue. One thing that is helping out (or hurting, depending on how you look at it) is the barrage of Christmas programming on the Lifetime Channel and the Lifetime Movie Network. Heaven help me, I’m enjoying the crap out of these movies. I mean, how many different versions of a Christmas Carol can one company make?
I will say that I’ve been known to scorn Lifetime programming in the past. In fact, my buddy Shell posted an article I wrote on his website: http://www.toptenz.net/top-10-worst-lifetime-original-movies.php. Either I’ve changed or they really ramp up the programming for Christmastime, or I’m immune to the crapulence that exudes from the television set. At least I’ve only allowed myself to watch in the bedroom – where we don’t have a DVR and I don’t muck up the queue with a bunch of these movies that would surely make Dwight roll his eyes so hard they might hop out of thier sockets.
So, stay tuned for the Top Ten Best Lifetime Christmas Movies. I think I’ll write it as soon as someone removes the knife that is lodged firmly above my left eye. Until then I will remain wracked by dirty-house guilt and wallow under the uncomfortably warm comforter and watch the cat lick herself in the flickering glow of a Lifetime Christmas movie starring Neil Patrick Harris and Naomi Watts. DOn’t worry. I don’t hate myself at all right now. Not at all.